Around about this time of year I start to build up a fair bit of (healthy) hate for cyclists. Especially slow, annoying, swerving, I own the road muppets.

At spinning last night I see all these “I will just get fit in the last week” Argus types. The spinning instructor dude asks “who here is not doing the Argus?” Weird how you can be proud not to be a part of some clubs.

Let’s face it.. it’s a logistical nightmare. I get some form of road-claustrophobia just thinking about it.. packs of people with shaven legs and bad fashion sense dodging water bottles, pumps and banana peels which others scatter all over the road. Not to mention the traffic annoyance.

On my way to work today, I see this woman in Camps Bay, she can barely peddle up a mild hill in 1st gear, swerving all over the place just to keep her balance, I notice the 3 spoke wheels and the Mercedes-Benz branding on her bicycle.. that thing must cost about R70k, W.T.F?

Aryan-geriatric muppet.

Remember, for your own sanity there will be 40k crazy people on the road this Sunday the 8th of March. Avoid them.

I’ll be on the beach.